Nessun Dorma
by jenajasper
Summary: This translates to 'none shall sleep' This story is nowhere near as serious as this sounds. Enjoy
1. Chapter 1

Sam drank a couple of obligatory beers with Dean after they completed that last job. He wasn't against letting off steam but, this had been a very long day at the end of a physically abusive case. Sam had purposely picked this place because it was within walking distance of their motel. He wouldn't be responsible for putting tired and drunk behind the wheel.

He asked Dean to leave with him but, big brother was already casting out the line and the bait seemed to be working. Sam grabbed his jacket and headed out. Sensing Dean incapable of more than flirting, tonight, Sam sent him a text when he got to their room. He was being proactive and hopefully preventing an unnecessary call in the middle of the night. The text read, 'turn left'.

Sam undressed and climbed under the covers. Unfortunately, the alcohol had tilted his internal regulators from tired to overtired and unable to sleep. He tried a hot shower and felt more relaxed. He crawled back into bed and closed his eyes, hugging his pillow.

Sam felt himself drifting off when, suddenly, he heard "Here's Johnny".

Dean was home. Sam pulled the covers over his head, deciding that ignoring Dean would make him stop. It almost worked.

Dean somehow realized that he might be disturbing Sam. He closed the door more quietly than was expected. Sam relaxed. Dean attempted to remove his jacket and the maneuver caused him to lose his balance.

At this point, he bumped into the table, knocking down a chair and overcompensating, he tripped over a duffle bag and fell in a heap onto the floor dragging a lamp down with him. All the while, amid half whispered expletives, he kept telling himself, 'shush' and 'Sammy's sleeping'.

Sammy was not sleeping. Sammy was getting pissed.

He said, "Dean, shut up!"

Dean's response was, "Shush."

Sam turned away and pulled the covers over his head.

Dean successfully made his way to his bed. Sam wondered if, perhaps, this was the real reason his brother always slept closest to the door. He sat on the edge, barely, and began to remove his boots. He quickly became off-balanced and slid to the floor. This time, he lost hold of his boot and it flew across the room, landing with a thud against the wall.

Sam flung off the covers and sat up. He asked his brother, "How do you get so drunk?"

As he awkwardly got to his feet, and putting on his best Blues Brothers persona, he answered, "One scotch, one bourbon and one beer."

Sam hung his head so Dean wouldn't see his smile. He knew that drunk Dean came in two varieties. The choices were self-destructive and combative or funny. And when drunk Dean was funny, he was fun.

Suddenly and very seriously, Dean said, "Sam, what happened to me? Why am I limping?"

Unable to hide his smile any longer, and with a little exasperation, Sam answered. "Dean...you're only wearing one boot."

Sam decided to forgo the sleep he wasn't getting, anyway and play with drunk Dean.


	2. Chapter 2

Sam got up and said, "Come on, Dean, let me put you to bed."

"No, I'm big brother. I'll put you to bed."

"I just got out of bed."

"Did I put you in it?" Sam shook his head in response.

"Okay, you put me to bed and I'll put you to bed."

Sam laughed and said, "Fine." He then pushed Dean down onto the bed to remove his other boot. Dean was helpful. As Sam bent over, he swung his foot up and kicked Sam in his chest knocking him down. He then said, "Wow, dude, you must be really tired."

Dean was becoming a little less fun. For lack of a better idea, if he was going to get any sleep at all, Sam suggested Dean take a shower. That had helped him to relax but, of course, he wasn't as far gone as Dean.

Sam collected himself and removed Dean's boot and socks. He laid his brother down with a very light push on his shoulder so Dean could remove his pants. That done, he left Dean laying down and singing.

Although he was smaller, Dean was surprisingly heavy. Sam hoisted him in a fireman's carry and walked towards the bathroom. Along the way, Dean sang something that could have been AC/DC.

When they finally reached the bathroom, Sam leaned Dean against the sink and turned on the water. Dean made an attempt to undress, creating havoc in the small room. Sam told him to wait until he was in the shower.

Dean needed assistance into the tub and Sam propped him up against the wall adjusting the shower head so the water would reach him. Sam left the room. Dean didn't move; he stood under the water and sang.

Dean had few inhibitions and none when he was drunk. So, the fact that he couldn't carry a tune, didn't stop him from singing. Sam found it amusing and identifying the songs, on occasion, took real skill. Dean not only sang correct lyrics, he sometimes made them up.

When Sam returned, after a few minutes, he found Dean in the same position. Sam asked, "Are you gonna get undressed?"

Dean looked down and said, "You mean I'm not?" Sam shook his head and turned off the water. He handed his brother a towel which, at first, Dean seemed not to recognize. Eventually, he draped it over his shoulders and stepped out of the tub. He was no less drunk than when he stepped in.

"


	3. Chapter 3

The fabric of the towel gave Sam a sufficient hand hold and he guided his brother out of the bath, grabbing a second towel on the way. While Dean waivered precariously on his own, Sam laid the second towel on his bed.

He grabbed his brother and sat him down. Dean fell back very quickly. While Sam went to retrieve dry clothes for him, Dean managed to peel off his wet ones.

While searching through the bags, Sam felt the slap of wet clothes on his back. He sighed as he rolled eyes and called to Dean as he tossed his clean clothes at him. The odds were not good. After the clothes landed on the bed, Dean raised his hand to catch them.

Sam had to admit he was having fun. He contemplated tossing Dean's boots at him. He picked up the wet clothing and hung them over a chair. When he turned back around, Sam realized Dean needed help with his t-shirt since had put his arm through the neck opening and could go no further.

The shower had done nothing but make Dean more pliable. Sam pulled the t-shirt over his head and successfully maneuvered his arms. It was then that he noticed the rough scraped knuckles. This looked fresh and Sam had checked Dean's injuries earlier in the day.

"When did this happen, Dean?" He got no answer until he put Dean's hand in front of his face.

"Oh, just told some guy to eat his nuts."

Sam had to admit that was a new one and he was sorry to have missed it. Suppressing his laughter, Sam asked why.

Dean told a convoluted story. The gist was that he was at the bar, talking to a girl and a guy was heckling him. He was picking at a bowl of peanuts. Dean ignored him but eventually turned to him and politely asked him to stop.

What Dean actually did was turn to the guy, full scowl, and say, "Shut up, and eat your nuts", adding, "not like you haven't heard that before." The man disagreed. However, it only took one punch to convince him. That done, Dean decided to leave.

Sam enjoyed funny Dean. He decided to try to put him to bed. At this point, it was relatively easy. Dean was now singing 'Enter Sandman.'

Sam brought his brother a bottle of water and stood by until he drank it all. He then got Dean under the covers. Dean asked Sam if he wanted to hear a joke. Sam said, "Sure."

"Why does the pirate wear brown pants?"

Laughing, Sam said, "That's not how it goes, Dean."

"You laughed."

Sam laughed again.

With Dean tucked in bed, Sam collected the towels as well as Dean's discarded clothes. He would leave the rest of the mess until tomorrow.

As he walked passed Dean's bed, he could hear the soft snoring that let him know his brother was finally at rest. Sam got under the covers as the sun peeked through the curtains.


End file.
